You can always spot true evil by the extra set of arms.

Grimace is a large, purple anthropomorphic being of indeterminate species with short arms and legs. He is known for his slow-witted demeanor. His most common expression is the word “duh”. Originally, Grimace was the “Evil Grimace”, with two pairs of arms with which to steal milkshakes. After that first campaign, the character was revised to be one of the “good guys”, and his number of arms was reduced by two. Commercials and merchandise generally portrayed him as a well-meaning simpleton, whose clumsy antics provided a comic foil to Ronald McDonald. The character was retained after the streamlining of the characters in the ’80s.

TV was much better in the early 1980s.

Why don’t we have quality shows like this anymore?

http://www.starcade.tv/starcade/episodes.asp

They don’t write ’em like they used to.

This link to an old eugenics text is worth more than a few looks. 

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/13444/13444-h/13444-h.htm

This fellow didn’t read it, and look how he ended up:

Dammit.  The link was foiled.

Awesome AND useful!

A periodic table of condiment shelf life.

A pearl of wisdom, which may actually lead to a proper blog post.

I give you the truest words I’ve read today:

As Doug of Hot Doug’s says, “There are no two finer words in the English language than ‘encased meats,’ my friend.”

Ken Jennings I’m not.

So the folks at the local Comcast offices decided a while back to start a new local game show, “Absolute Zero”.  The Register Star picked up on it and ran a couple of articles that you can read here:

Absolute Zero article

 

Anyway, they announced another set of auditions and I decided to give it a shot.  I also managed to talk my mom into coming along so I’d know someone there, plus I thought she’d get a kick out of it.  We ended up in the same tryout group and had a spirited practice game – they didn’t keep proper score at the audition but we both answered a decent amount of questions.  We were both invited back for tapings, and they’re now airing.

If you live in the Rockford area and have cable via Comcast, you can see the debacle at the following times:

The show can be seen on Cable Channel 17 at the following dates and times:

Wednesday, May 7th – 7:00pm

Thursday, May 8th – 5:30pm

Friday, May 9th – 8:30pm

(TENTATIVE) Sunday, May 11th – 8:30am (subject to change)

 

It can also be seen on Cable Channel 57 at the following dates and times:

Thursday, May 8th – 9:00pm

Saturday, May 10th – 3:55pm and 6:00pm

Sunday, May 11th – 1:35pm

I’ll let you watch to see how it turned out, but I had a good time at the taping.  The other two contestants were very nice guys, and everyone at Comcast was more than hospitable.  I kept telling myself that it was just a local access quiz show, there were only 8 or 9 people in the room and that only a handful of people would ever see it air, but I still had nerves like it was Jeopardy.  I’m such a dork.

I do agree with Justin, though.  They need the Adjudicator to run the event.

Oh, and Best Buy has the new Tokyo Police Club for $7.99ish.  Go buy it NOW.

Walking for Asthma – May 10, 2008

Good grief.  I haven’t blogged in 6 weeks.  I’ll get back to a regular routine at once.  Well, maybe.

For now, though, I am making a last-minute plea for pledges for the American Lung Association’s Asthma Walk this Saturday.  Those of you who HAVE sponsored me, thank you VERY much.  Everything helps, especially when there are so many fundraisers and charities and money only goes so far.

If you’d like to make a pledge, click here:

My Asthma Walk Page

 

Thanks very much for the support.  I’ll be back to snarky and annoying before you know it.

So it is written: Baseball 2008

I guess I really should have posted this before that engrossing 2-game series in Japan between the Red Sox and the A’s, but here are my predictions for the 2008 MLB season:

American League:

East Champion: Boston Red Sox

Central Champion: Detroit Tigers

West Champion: Seattle Mariners

Wildcard: Cleveland Indians

AL Champion: Detroit Tigers

MVP: Grady Sizemore

Cy Young Award: Erik Bedard

Rookie of the Year: Evan Longoria

National League:

NL East Champion: Philadelphia Phillies

NL Central Champion: Chicago Cubs (okay, okay.)

NL West Champion: Arizona Diamondbacks

Wildcard: New York Mets

NL Champion: Chicago Cubs

MVP: Ryan Howard

Cy Young Award: Jake Peavy

Rookie of the Year: Kosuke Fukudome

World Series winner: Chicago Cubs 4-2 over Detroit Tigers

Your opinions, please.

More Movies and Weekend Miscellany

It’s 2:44 PM and I’m very, very sick of fake Irish accents.

Let’s get caught up on what I’ve been watching (aside from hours and hours of DVR’ed Cash in the Attic):

Live Free or Die Hard: I was up until about 4:15 Sunday morning watching this and can’t decide whether it was worth losing sleep over.  It was fun for the most part, but the believability certainly was a bit lacking.  I was quite relieved when it finally occurred to me that the good hacker is the guy from the Mac commercials.  That was bugging me.

LoudQUIETloud:  This documentary about the Pixies reunion was nice but nothing earthshattering.  I did enjoy seeing David Lovering in his new life as a stage magician.  I need to investigate the Martinis, Joey Santiago’s project with his wife.  Sounded good. 

Hell House:  Creepy documentary about the ultra-Christian haunted houses that demonstrate the dangers of rock music, abortion, booze, drugs, raves and (from what I could tell) the Internet.  I think watching this has pretty much satisfied my curiosity and stopped me from any chance of checking one of these out in person just for the experience. 

Eastern Promises: This was pretty eh.  I think the good reviews I was given were mostly due to Viggo fighting in the buff, so I see how they missed the actual not-so-goodness of the movie.  Viggo’s accent is pretty bad.  I hated the ending but there’s some good stuff in there.  Worth watching.

War: I like Jet Li.  I like Jason Statham a lot.  This movie is terrible.  Do not watch.

Southern Discomfort: This is a documentary from the early 2000’s about pro rasslin in the U.S. south.  Good stuff – the fans are just awesome.  This is what wrestling is all about.  The best line is when a local is asked why he goes to see the shows and he replies, “I go to see the stars, like the Iron Sheik and Bob Jackson, not some jerk off the street.”  He obviously has a keen eye for talent.  Bonus points for Bob Armstrong wrestling at the age of 94.

Other nuggets and tidbits:

• I picked up the Shout Out Louds record on Saturday and highly recommend it.  Really fun stuff.
• I have no idea why anyone would go to Qdoba as long as there is a Chipotle within 50 miles.
• UCLA is going to win the NCAA tournament.
• I am hungry and tired.
• If offered an Irish Pride cocktail, do not accept it.  Irish whiskey, half & half and creme de menthe are not meant to be mixed. 

Quote of the Day, 2/29/08

A “pal” explains to The Sun why Noel Gallagher is selling his pad in Ibiza:

 “He can’t stand the thought of James Blunt writing crap songs down the road.”